People say that your life will never be the same after you have kids, and that's true. Others say that your life is over once you have kids. That couldn't be farther from the truth. I remember so vividly standing in my dorm room last year holding that positive test in shock and thinking "wow, my life is really about to change." 

And it did, but for the better.

Sure, there have been some pretty difficult times, but there has been so many more wonderful times to make up for it. Becoming a mom changed EVERYTHING for me, and with Lilah only being a couple of months away from turning one, I wanted to share with y'all some of the lessons and things that I've learned from becoming a mom at 19.

1. The best things in life are unexpected.
Obviously I didn't plan on becoming a young mom my whole life. Now, Lilah is the biggest blessing I've been given, and I couldn't imagine not having her here. Crazy how something you never expected happening becomes the most important and special part of your life.
2. Becoming a mom is a challenge no matter your age.
I've learned that every woman, regardless of age, will struggle the first time they become a mom. Whether you're 16 or 35, it still won't be easy. Sure, younger moms will face a few more obstacles along the way, but your age does not determine whether or not you will be a good mom.

3. There are more important things to life other than partying.
It's okay to party when you're in college. But being a mom in college means not really getting to do a whole lot of that. But, I realized that it doesn't matter that I'm missing out on the whole "college partying" scene. Personally, even if I could go out and get wasted every weekend, I'd much rather spend that time with my little family. Once in a while I might go out and get a little crazy, but being a mom has really made me grow up fast, and realize what really matters in life.   

4. What other people think of you does not matter.
People are waiting longer and longer to start a family nowadays, so being a teen or young mom is still pretty taboo in our society. Even though I wasn't suuuper young, I still knew that there were probably people out there who would look down on my choices. And ya know what? Who cares. It's my life, and as long as I'm happy with it, that's all that matters. 

5. It's okay not to have it all together.
It's a hard to become a mom. There are trials and triumphs. There is a 99% chance that your life will not be something that could be taken straight out of Pinterest. And that's okay. I've learned to accept that I will not have it together all the time. Things will probably be messy for a while. Life is supposed to be messy. I know that as long as I'm doing my best for my daughter, that's all I can do.

6. You learn from experience.
Seriously, I read so much about babies and parenting and what's "best" my entire pregnancy. After Lilah arrived, most of that just got thrown out the window. Not everything will be by the book, and you learn most about parenting as you go. 

7. There's no such thing as a perfect parent.
Yeah, there will always seem to be those "perfect" moms that have everything together. But in reality, every mom goes through difficult times as a parent. So, I keep that in mind whenever I start trying to compare myself and my parenting to another.
8. Children do not stop you from succeeding. 
This is very relevant to being a young mom. Society tends to put out the consensus that you will never succeed if you have a baby while you're still in school. Which is complete crap. You can accomplish ANYTHING you put your mind to if you're willing to work hard. Kids don't stop you from that. If anything, I'm more determined than ever to get my degree and be successful now that Lilah is here. 

9. Your baby/family always comes first.
Priorities change the second you become a parent. Nothing comes before your kids. My family is the most important thing to me. 

10. You can have just as much of an amazing life as someone who waited to have kids until they were 30.
Your life is as good as YOU make it. Simple as that. Young mom or not, you can lead just as much of a fulfilling life as someone who waited to have kids until they were older. 

Having a baby young does not mean that your future is over. It just means you'll have a different type of one. A rewarding, crazy, exciting, hectic, and very, very wonderful one. 

Stay tuned for more posts soon!

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  1. Heather, this was such a great post! And so true! I hope you and your family are doing well!

    Kaci xx

    1. Thank you so much Kaci, I'm glad you liked it! We're doing great.
      I hope you're having lots of fun on your trip, I look forward to reading about it on your blog.☺

  2. Heather, I know so many incredible wives/mothers, husband/fathers who married young and had kids right away, including my husband and I. When I found out I was pregnant with Jack I was terrified that being a mother would ruin my life. I just didn't feel ready but once Jack came, everything was so different than anything had described it. Being a mother IS hard and challenging and lonely sometimes and we complain because sometimes ya just need to! but it's also this experience like nothing you've ever felt before. This bond and love that is so unshakeable. ahhh, I'm getting emotional reading this post and commenting. BABIES. love em. Anyways, proud of you momma! This post is awesome.

    1. Marisa, thank you so much for taking the time to comment. I'm so glad you enjoyed my post. It's so nice to hear about someone else's experience as a younger mother. I too was scared when I found out I was pregnant, but now Lilah is the best thing in my life. It's hard a lot of times, but you are so right that the bond and love is incredible. It makes me emotional too! I'm sure Jack is a little angel. Wishing you the best! xx


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